How many relationships do you need to realise that the only relationship you need is the one with the self. Even then, you don’t even need that. You just need to be with yourself. Present. Existing. Live in your body, do everything with deliberate intent. Let nothing escape you. Engage your attention fully in the moment. Yes, there are distractions, but realise that they are there to distract you and pull your mind back to now. Nothing else exists but the now. Think about it.
Your relationships will not transform you, they will exist beneficially only when you transform yourself. Become yourself. Yes, however, perhaps they will provoke you to retreat back into your heart, back to earlier versions of yourself, and they might just offer you the opportunity to realise the present. Gracefully accept that you now is all that you have. Begin to live your life right now. The years does not matter, nor do the seconds.
Breathe into your lungs, right now.